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Zaq

New member
Dec 24, 2020
7
0
1
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Sleep is very important part of our daily routine and every adult or child should have minimum 8 hours of sleep to get ready for the next day. Insomnia is quite common in this era and is a growing problem day by day which can be observed in people of all ages. There can be various reasons for lack of sleep among individuals like busy schedule in jobs, night shifts or late-night studies etc.

It is a really difficult situation for an individual if he or she feel insomniac as it can cause serious problems which may include loss of appetite, tiredness at work, spoiled mood and others. People do not feel positive and energetic at work which may hamper their performance and eventually their career growth. They may also face difficulties in performing any laborious tasks and work which demands physical strength.

Apart from issues at work, many people may face health issues like indigestion, fatigue, depression etc. which can become serious if insomnia stays for a longer period of time. There can be problems related to mental illness which can affect mental health of some people. Sometimes people take sleeping pills to kill the problem temporarily without consulting any physician which results in more serious problems afterwards.


These problems should not be ignored and immediate actions should be taken to solve the major problem which is lack of sleep. Firstly, people should find out the reason behind sleeplessness and check out if it is happening on regular basis. If it is frequent, they should immediately consult a physician to find out the root cause of the problem. Sometimes it can be related to mental disturbance for which people may visit some good psychologist to rectify such problems. In addition, If physically and mentally sound, they can try other ways like listening to some good music which can make them feel good when they are off to bed and can help in sleep. They can also make some changes in their lifestyle to come out of this problem. They can join some Yoga or Dance classes or sports club or any such hobby which involves physical activity after which they may get a sound sleep.


That being said, as mentioned earlier, a sound sleep plays a very important role in keeping us energetic and strong for doing our day-to-day tasks. If someone does not get enough sleep on a day, they may face the consequences on the next day itself. One should never ignore sleeplessness problem and should immediately take necessary actions to come out of it. As they say Health is directly proportional to wealth. Similarly, sleep is directly proportional to health.
 

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englishgeek

Member
Sep 23, 2020
198
21
18
Sleep is a very important part of our daily routine and every adult or child should have a minimum of 8 hours of sleep to get ready for the next day. Insomnia is quite common in this era and it is a growing problem day by day which can be observed in people of all ages. There can be various reasons for lack of sleep among individuals like a busy schedule in their jobs, night shifts or late-night studies etc. [I wouldn't recommend using etc in these types of essays.]

It is a really difficult situation for an individual if he or she feels insomniac [I think it is better to say "has insomnia"] as it can cause serious problems which may include loss of appetite, tiredness at work, spoiled mood, and others problems. People do not feel positive and energetic at work which may hamper their performance and eventually their career growth. They may also face difficulties in performing any laborious tasks and work which demands physical strength.

Apart from issues at work, many people may face health issues like indigestion, fatigue, depression etc. which can become serious if insomnia stays for a longer period of time. There can be problems related to mental illness which can affect mental health of some people. Sometimes people take sleeping pills to kill counter the problem temporarily without consulting any physician which results in more serious problems afterwards.

These problems should not be ignored and immediate actions should be taken to solve the major problem which is lack of sleep. Firstly, people should find out the reason behind sleeplessness and check out if it is happening on regular basis. If it is frequent, they should immediately consult a physician to find out the root cause of the problem. Sometimes it can be related to mental disturbance for which people may visit some good psychologist to rectify such problems. In addition, If physically and mentally sound, they can try other ways like listening to some good music which can make them feel good when they are off to bed and can help in with sleep. They can also make some changes in their lifestyle to come out of this problem. They can join some Yoga or Dance yoga or dance classes or a sports club or any such hobby which involves physical activity after which they may get a sound sleep.

That being said, as mentioned earlier, a sound sleep getting a good night's sleep plays a very important role in keeping us energetic and strong for doing our day-to-day tasks. If someone does not get enough sleep on a day, they may face the consequences on the next day itself the following day. One should never ignore sleeplessness problem sleep disorders and should immediately take necessary actions to come out of it. As they say, "Health is directly proportional to wealth". Similarly, sleep is directly proportional to health.
 

englishgeek

Member
Sep 23, 2020
198
21
18
You have some good points in your essay, but they don't flow well from one idea to the next. They feel kind of random.

Task response: 6

Presents relevant main ideas but some may be inadequately developed/unclear

Coherence and cohesion: 6

Uses cohesive devices effectively, but cohesion within and/or between sentences may be faulty or mechanical

Lexical resource: 6

Uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task

Grammatical range and accuracy: 6

Makes some errors in grammar and punctuation but they rarely reduce communication
 

Zaq

New member
Dec 24, 2020
7
0
1
Thanks Mike !! Wish you and your Family a very Happy and Prosperous New Year!

Thanks a lot for such a detailed feedback!

I will work on these mistakes and hope to improve next time.

Best Rgds